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Thursday, January 3, 2013

INEVITABLES GOLOSAS

pequeñitas, revoltosas,
vosotras amigas viejas,
me evocais todas las cosas...
j.m.serrat

la mujeres tienden a comer cuando estan enamoradas, embarazadas, ansiosas, encabronadas, excitadas, borrachas y drogadas. comen hasta llorando. comen por todo. hasta singando comen (en sentido figurativo). porque cuando usted ve una dama que deja de comer es que realmente esta enferma pero con diarreas, porque ni deprimidas dejan de comer; ahi es cuando mas se aferran al refrigerador. lo demas es forzado; dieta. tengo un amigo que, tomando unas fuertes pastillas para domir recetadas por su medico, una noche que no pudo dormirse vio a su mujer levantarse de madrugada con tremendo sigilo e irse del cuarto. regreso 2 horas despues; y como enseguida se durmio mi amigo supuso que habia ido a comer, pues no. la vigilo y descubrio que la lujuriosa recibia a un hombre en la sala y alli en el sofa tenian su sesion carnal. terminado el embarque de carne hacia el interior, la dama regresaba a su lecho matrimonial con su marido inerte. mi amigo no cambio de mujer, cambio de medico para que le recetara mejores pastillas. de todas formas era el hambre de carne la que levantaba a su conyuge. que de por si la hembra del bicho humano es la golosa porque es la que mete carne por cualquiera de los 3 huecos que tiene. entonces estamos ante un specimen que presenta consumo instintivo. mas bien compulsivo. de ahi le viene el desenfreno de gastar a la varona. desaparece el pene, el flan y la cuenta bancaria. pero mientras mas glotona, gastadora y puta, mas alegre. cuidese de la hembra frugal, tacaña y recatada. es amargada hasta la pared de enfrente y de por si, frivola y mal mamadora. pero casi todas viven por y para el cuerpo. en mis años de guayabito de gym vi como esos locales se llenan de ellas siempre en enero. para vaciarse en abril cuando llega la privamera y les altera la sangre y se ponen a correr -en forma- detras del macho. y luego ante la amenaza del verano las señoras insisten en usar la tanga que no les sirve, que les raja el culo por atras; y entonces se cuelan de nuevo a hacer piruetas de pilates, aerobicos, calistenia y todo tipo de murumaca inventada para quitarles dinero a las muy comemierdas. porque ya hay un ejercicio que solo es subir y bajar un escalon; y por eso cobran los descarados entrenadores locales, casi todos argentinos. le roncan los cojones. pero quienes mejor viven son las gordas declaradas. para las que el tummy-tuck esta prohibido porque las clinicas de miami no tienen permiso para oleoductos. pero ojo con ellas que son las mas felices y sexuales, segun guinness, wikipedia y fernando botero. su unico problema es en una sola posicion del coito: encima. las que lo practican son acusadas de asesinato premeditado por asfixia o contraccion del torax. por lo demas, terminando esto voy al patio a aferrarme a los yerros otra vez, con el dolor del alma y la disciplina del corazon, porque la jeba mia ya esta haciendo abdominales. su problema, dice, es el belly: efumemismo femenino usado aca para la panza.©varela
COMENTARIOS ABIERTOS

tiny, unruly,
you old ones friends,
evoke all things to me...
j.m.serrat

the women tend to eat when they are in love, pregnant, anxious, pissed off, excited, drunk and drugged. they eat up crying. they eat everything. even when fucking they eat (in the figurative sense). because when you see a lady who stops eating is that really are sick with diarrhea, 'cause neither depressed stop eating; there is where the more they cling to the refrigerator. the other is forced; diet. i have this friend who, taking some strong sleeping pills for prescription by his doctor, a night that he can't not sleep saw his wife getting up in the middle of the night with tremendous stealth and leaving the room. she returns 2 hours later; and as soon was asleep my friend guessed that she had gone to eat, then not. he watch her and discovered that the lust received a man in the living room and there on the sofa had his carnal session. completed the shipment of meat towards the inside, the lady was returning to her marriage bed with her inert husband. my friend not change the woman, change the physician, to change the pills prescription. anyway was hunger for meat that lifted his spouse. that's sure the female of the human bug is the greedy one because it's that puts meat by any of the 3 holes that has. then we have a specimen that presents instinctive consumption. rather compulsive. hence comes the varona spending binge. disappears the penis, the flan, and the bank account. but while most glutton, money pit and fucker, more cheerful. you has to be careful with the frugal, stingy and demure female. it's bitter without hesitation, frivolous and bad sucker. but almost all of them live by and for the body. in my guayabito gym's years i saw how these places are always filled of them in january. to be emptied in april when the spring comes  and alters their blood and get to running -in shape- behind the males. and then facing the threat of summer these ladies insist on using the thong that doesn't fit them, trying to cut their ass from behind; and then slip back to do pirouettes of pilates, aerobics, calisthenics and all kinds of acrobatics invented to remove money to the very comemierdas. because there is already an exercise which is only up and down a step; and that is charged by the local blatant coaches, almost all argentines. snore los cojones. but those better living are the declared fatty. as for the tummy-tuck is forbidden because miami clinics don't have permission to oil pipelines. but have an eye with them that are the most happy and sexual, according to guinness, wikipedia and fernando botero. their only problem is in one position of sexual intercourse: on top. those who practice it are accused of premeditated murder by suffocation or contraction of the chest. for the others, ending this i'm going to the playground to hold me to the misdeeds again, with the soul pain and the heart discipline, 'cause my gal is already doing abdominals. her problem, she says, is the belly: femenine euphemism used over here to la panza.
©varela